Thursday, 14 July 2022

Paradise: Chapter 4: Numbers (5557)(DRAFT!)

 

Chapter 4: Numbers (5557)



Helen nodded at the Red Cross agent, a tough looking man with an eye-patch. Either a soldier or a swashbuckling pirate in a former life, she had no idea.

‘Thanks, Ned,’ she muttered as she handed the phone back to him, hoped down out of his truck and shuffled back to her dormitory, following a line of grey-clad women who were coming back from their evening meal.

It would be an hour before lights out, the women were expected to patch up their clothes in that time or perform other mundane tasks. Some had jobs to do outside the dorm. It was a wooden structure, a hot sweaty box that didn’t get much air. It was cooler up here on the hillsides than down in the jungle, but not by much.

Helen lay down on her bed, the lower bunk of a crude wooden bunkbed and stared up at the half-rotten beams and tatty mattress above. She was beyond self-pity now, two months in the gulag had scorched away all her protective layers of bluster and self-delusion.

More women filed in, mainly black skinned, locals from the Delta. They sat together, fanning themselves with bits of cardboard, talking and laughing, a sound like exotic birds. The locals were the kindest of all the slaves, but Helen found them difficult to talk to, her skin colour marked her out. To them she was “one of dem left-over women”, a displaced person, not worth getting to know as she’d soon be dead of a splinter virus, worked to death or burnt. They were the originals, the first women on the farm, from a congregation of Methodists that had been rounded up by the Committee. Since then, others like Helen had arrived. There were stories about a men’s camp not so far away, but only stories.

Her bunkmate, a large Delta woman with her hair tied up in a plastic bag, ignoring Helen completely, heaved herself up onto the top bunk, sending down a small shower of dust that landed on Helen’s face. She took off her round glasses, and after rubbing her eyes for a bit, cleaned the lenses on her sleeve.

A big black hand loomed down from the top bunk, tough and gnarled like a bear paw. It waved for attention then pointed at a folded magazine lying on top of a basket beside the bed. Helen picked it up and passed it up to the hand.

“There you go Melissa,’ she squeaked. There was a grunt from above.


Ten minutes before lights out a group of women came in, recently fed and washed, workers from the backdam, returned after a week of brashing and undergrowth clearance in the Brown Ebony and Ironwood forests. A thin young woman, very dark skinned and with a shaved head had been using one of the women’s bunks. She was new and would not have known she had been sleeping in another woman’s bed that last three nights. The backdam women were the toughest of the slaves in the entire farm and despite the young woman’s apologies they began to kick her about.

Helen sat up on her bunk and watched on. She knew not to get involved but the young slave was so pathetic in appearance, in a ragged and dirty smock, with not even a pair of sandals for her feet.

The backdam slaves pushed and pulled her around until the smock was ripped off her body entirely, revealing her thin, breastless and naked body. The backdam women laughed all the harder as she tried to cover herself again.

‘What you trying to hide there, missy?’ they hollered. ‘You as flat as a saucer.’

Then they saw a witch’s mark on her body, a pale mole on her left hip and the pushes and kicks became more violent.

Obeah! You a witch!’ they cried. ‘Church slave! Dey burn you witch!’

This was finally too much for Helen. She was timid and half broken by her time in the camp, but before the reditus, her and Gary had run a hostel in Australia for eight years. She was used to bossing people around and settling disputes in dormitories, and now all that muscle memory kicked in, catapulting her across the room in the young girl’s defence even before she had time to think of what exactly it what it was she was going to do when she got there.

‘Hey!’ she yelled at them. ‘Leave them alone you big bullies!’

There was sudden silence as they all turned to look at her. She stooped to pick up the girl’s smock from the floor and handed it to her.

‘Stay out of this, bule,’ said one of the backdam women, using the local racial slur for white people.

‘It’s over,’ snapped back Helen. ‘If she’s a church slave then she belongs over there with the rest of us.’

Helen made to leave but one of the larger women grabbed her by the arm. She towered over Helen who was barely five feet tall. As the women pulled her arm to hit Helen, a shadow passed across them. They both turned to see Melissa looming at Helen’s side. Melissa, with her forehead as flat and as broad as an anvil, well over six foot tall, wearing a ragged t-shirt and a pair of men’s jeans, she was a walking wall of intimidation. The backdam woman released her grip on Helen who then took the opportunity to yank the girl away.

‘Come on over here with us,’ said Helen, soothing the sobbing girl. ‘Me and Melissa and a few of the others are all from the church. You can bunk with us.’

Melissa silently turned and when to her bunk, where she once more climbed up into the creaking upper berth. Helen ushered the girl into the lower bed, saying, ‘look, you can share my bed tonight and we’ll get you sorted out tomorrow,’ as she again picked up the dropped magazine and handed it up to Mellissa.

Both Helen and the girl were small, so they fit on the long bunk together easily. By the time they were settled the custodian had been around to blow out all the lamps and as Melissa caused the whole bed frame creak and groan above them as she tried to find a comfortable position to sleep in, they had a whispered conversation.

‘Thank you miss,’ whispers the girl, her head beside Helen’s on the narrow pillow.

‘How old are you?’ asked Helen.

‘Sixteen miss,’ answered the girl. ‘My name is Tina, miss.’

‘Do they have you detailed yet?’

‘Dey got me working in de kitchen, miss.’

‘Oh, that’s ok then,’ said Helen, trying to sound comforting. ‘You should be fine there.’

Helen herself had started in the coffee plantations but was too small and weak to be much use, so they had moved her to the orange orchard where she worked with one other woman watering and weeding around the Parson Brown orange trees.

‘Better sleep now anyway, Tina,’ whispered Helen. ‘They don’t like it if we talk too much after lights out.’




The next morning Helen had come back to the farm to fetch a ladder for the orange grove. As she exited the barn, she had gone to get it from she was confronted by two of the backdam women from the night before. They blocked the doorways with their bodies, menacing silhouettes again the bright sunlight outside.

‘Hey, where you going, scunt?’ one of the snapped.

Helen stopped in her tracks and dropped the ladder. ‘What do you want?’

‘What you tink?’ the smirked. ‘We guna box you up prappa!’

The woman who had just spoken lunged and caught Helen on the nose, a blow that caused blood to flow, but it was the only hand they were ever going to lay on her, because the smaller women dummied to the right then fled to her left, up a pile of hay bales and hurled herself bodily out of the window at their summit.

She landed in the dirt and was on her feet and running as the two larger turned and chased after her. She sniffed and spat out blood as she ran, heading for the main gate where there were two guards who might rescue her, or maybe they would watch and laugh and she was beaten. If she could get to the grove her boss would protect her at least.

As she reached the gates, a big black church SUV rolled into courtyard and stopped right in front of her. She tripped over her own feet and fell to her knees. Glancing over her shoulder she could see the other women had stop too, they looked as confused as she was. Church cars were rarely good news. The passenger door of the sinister vehicle opened. Helen awaited her fate.



***

Father Nimite had decided to make the best of the journey as he could. He was not a smart man, he told himself, but if he trusted in God, how could he go wrong? He didn’t really know what to expect to find in Goldengreens. Something pretty awful, if half the stories were true.

He sat in the back of the church SUV with a large bag of cassava pone and sugar cake that he shared with the driver. He was regretting sitting in the back of the car. He had planned on having a nap, but the road was too uneven for sleeping and now every time he wanted to talk to the driver or offer a sweet, he had to lean forward.

The next time they stopped he’d move through to the front he decided, but for now he leaned his arms on the seat rests, watching the roadside shops roll by and making conversation. The driver he knew from before, a tall and raw-boned fellow by the name of Samuel Benjamin, who was currently keeping his eyes on the road, watching for potholes and fallen branches.

‘You been down this way recently, Samuel?’ he asked.

‘Not since de reditus, Father,’ replied the driver.

‘How long we got to go do you think?’ asked Nimite.

Samuel shrugged. It was anyone’s guess. This road along the coast was in a sad state of repair and the road through the jungle was expected to be a whole lot worse. Beyond the thin line of civilisation, the jungle loomed, a sweltering mass of untamed vegetation. Somewhere in there was Goldengreens, and beyond that Zion, then Paradise, names from the before times that seemed quaint now, then – eventually – the mountains, and beyond that no one from Evermarch or the Delta had so far dared to go. Before the reditus it had been the Amazon basin, but now? God only knew.

The car ground its way along the brick-topped road all the way to Adelphi, where they would have their last look at the sea before plunging into the hot green gloom of the forest. Nimite was dreading it, so he signalled Samuel to stop, and they got out and stretched their legs. They walked down to the wild wide beach, for lack of anywhere better to go.

‘This is it, Father,’ said Samuel as they came to a halt. ‘You naw see the sea again until we get back.’

Nimite breathed in the cool sea breeze as if he was drinking it. He looked out across the water, the gentle sound of the waves rolling in soothing his nerves. Well, at least the blood tide had gone now, swirled away to where he did not know, but it had coloured the coastline red for a whole year right at the start of everything. It had killed a lot of the sea life too, and the stink had been so bad that people in the Delta had moved inland to be away from it. Evermarch had managed a little better due to the lower temperature, and when the rivers had clogged up with dead fish, dolphins, whales, seals and everything else, the city had at least been organised enough to have the manpower to deal with it. Not so the Delta, where whale corpses still lay rotting up and down the coast. Not only that, but wrecked ships. Nimite could see three big ones from where he was standing, dark shadows in the sea haze. People lived in some of the wrecks, he had been told.

‘All as foretold in Revelations,’ he remarked to Samuel, sweeping his right arm across the view of the coastline. ‘Although the same verse foretells a great mountain burning with fire cast into the sea, but I don’t know where that went.’

‘We are probably better off not knowing,’ said Samuel.

Nimite turned and headed back to the car.

‘You still got that cat?’ he asked conversationally as he got in the passenger seat.

‘Enid?’ replied Samuel. ‘Yes Father. She managed to survive everything.’

Samuel started the engine and pulled the car out onto the main road. There had been a little traffic coming to Adelphi, but the road they were now taking was deserted and overgrown.

‘Here we go,’ he murmured as he turned on the headlights.

‘I remember dat cat,’ went on Nimite with a melodious laugh. ‘And that woman. You here from that woman you used to… What were she name now…’

‘Desdemona?’

‘Oh!’ laughed Nimite. ‘Desdemona, that right! Now there was a woman. She used to shack up with that fella O’Henry. You remember? She lash him up with a cutlass then ran away to de refuge on St George Street. What a fine figure she had. You know what happen to her?’

Samuel shrugged again. ‘Me naw no.’

‘I remember it so well, Samuel’, Nimite ever tugging on the driver’s shoulder. ‘One of the last days. Days before de change you know. And O’Henry comin to look for her… Oh I remember, I hear it from de nuns at the refuge, he and his men were there, comin to taker her out and do God only knew. And then? I don’t know what happened after that, because then the refuge was gone and all de nuns in it and we had the clansmen instead. Do you know what happened to her, Samuel?’

‘I’ve no idea,’ replied Samuel, although he knew very well. Desdemona was in his own flat, lying on his sofa watching TV and eating metemgee bought from a street vendor.

Nimite patted his driver on the knee and leaned back in his seat. ‘Well. I hope she ok, but you naw, she was a wild one. I hope she’s ok.’

Nimite turned to the left and watched the jungle slowly go by for a few minutes. He was not a subtle man, but his vocation had made him sensitive to people’s feelings and he could see that Samuel was getting a little defensive about his line of questioning, so he dropped it.


Nimite slept through much of the rest of the journey. It was early in the morning, still dark, but getting lighter when Samuel woke him.

‘We are here, Father.’

‘Oh,’ groaned Nimite as he came to his senses. ‘No trouble?’

‘No trouble, Father,’ replied Samuel. ‘We went through a couple of unmanned checkpoints coming up.’

Nimite sat up and stretched, then opened the car door and slowly worked his way out of the seat.

The hot humid night air was a striking contrast after the cool air conditioning of the car. He had not been to Goldengreens since before the reditus, but he still recognised it. Samuel had driven them into the carpark by the church. Looking left and right he could see the main street of the town, dark and silent, not even a streetlamp to light their way, only the light of the moon showing the outline of the roofs against the sky.

The door of the church opened and an old man in shorts peered out at them, silhouetted by the light inside.

‘Father Nimite?’ gasped the old man. ‘Is that you?’

‘It is, its!’ beamed Nimite. ‘We tried to call, Father Dekulos, but could not get through. So, I have been sent!’

‘Well come in then, come in,’ muttered the elderly priest, chewing on his cheek.

While Samuel was sent through to the kitchen to rouse the maid and get some breakfast, the two priests went through the Dekulos’s office where he found and threw on a T-shirt, covering up his skinny ribs and wiry white chest hair. The office was dark, lit from moonlight only, until Dekulos located and lit an oil lamp. As his eyes adjusted to the gloom, he saw a wide desk with empty bookcases behind it. Stacks of newspapers lay about on the floor and were piled up against two over-stuffed filing cabinets. Father Dekulos did not keep a tidy home.

‘I’m glad you are here,’ muttered the older priest as he moved a cat off his office chair and sat down to needlessly arrange some papers. ‘We’ve been cut off for such a long time. Just a few hours of electricity each day. It was ok, we was doing ok, but…’

Nimite waited, but the old priest had evidently finished. To Nimite, the old man looked lonely and exhausted. A shadow of the man he had known only a few years ago when they had both lived and preached in Georgetown.

‘Well,’ the younger man began with a cough. ‘Perhaps you can guess why I’m here. The bishop sent me down to find out what’s happenin wit deez farms you got here.’

Dekulos looked forlorn, huddled on his chair with a knee up to his chin. ‘It’s the Committee. They are a law unto themselves. They take over the farms and make many camps in de jungle around here.’

‘Where are the papers? The need permission from the diocese for such things.’

Dekulos made a token movement towards some of the papers on his desk.

‘What even are they producing?

‘Sugar cane, coffee, fruit, they got pigs I think.’

‘Where does it go?’ asked Nimite with a yawn. ‘It doesn’t come up to Evermarch.’

‘I think it goes south.’

‘South?’ asked the younger priest sitting forward, suddenly more alert. ‘There is nothing to the south!’

‘This is what I hear, but they keep the gates shut, no one is allowed in. The trucks leave, but to where I don’t know.’ The kitchen maid came in with a tray of tea.

‘What about the slaves dey got there?’ ask Nimite as he accepted a cup with a nod of thanks.

‘A big parcel of Leopard Street Methodists, that’s what they say,’ replied Dekulos. ‘They all up in de backdam. The women’s camp at Develde Farm is the closest, that’s where the gossip comes from. They have other camps further back, or so they say.’

‘Maybe we go there then,’ said Nimite as he drank his hot cane-sugar sweetened tea.

For a moment Dekulos looked alarmed. ‘Better not, Father Nimite. They will not let you in. I tell you what, there is a logging camp, now that I remember, that is just as close. I can take you up there.’

They talked a short while longer, then Nimite was shown to his room. He made sure to say good night to Samuel.

‘Everything ok, Father?’ asked his driver.

‘Father Dekulos is a good man,’ whispered Nimite. ‘Or he used to be. There is the devil’s work here.’

Samuel’s eyebrows raised, but Father Nimite said nothing more, turned and went to his room.

The next morning Father Nimite talked to Samuel alone after breakfast. ‘Father Dekulos will guide us to the woman’s camp after Sext prayers. I’ll call for you after lunch, keep your eyes and ears open Samuel.’

***

There was an air of menace as they drove through the town in the afternoon. To Father Nimite’s eyes the people looked haunted. They had been cut off for a year after the reditus, an event that had been confusing and chaotic enough on the Delta was even worse out here. Right at the start several hundred clansmen had been dumped in the area, but they had all been picked up now and resettled in the Delta projects. What was left now was a portion of the original people of Goldengreens, dressed in colourful patched up clothes that seemed out of place on the gaunt shuffling frames of those that wore them.

It was three miles to the farm, and they rode there in silence. There were armed men dressed in black at the gate, but when they saw the church plates on the car, they waved it through.

Samuel rolled the car into the main compound then followed a lane round to where several other vehicles were parked. The two priests stepped out just as a woman was being chased across the farmyard by several others. The pursuers’ shouts stopped abruptly when they saw the expensive church SUV and the priests. Their quarry tumbled to the ground, a small white woman with blood in her mouth.

‘What is the meaning of this?’ asked Nimite, pulling himself up to his full height. With his sunglasses on his round acne-scarred face he was an intimidating sight and towered over the slave woman who had just fallen at his feet.

He leant down and she scrambled back, but he was only reaching for the spectacles that had fallen off her face when she had tripped. Nimite blew the dust off them and handed them back to her.

Just as he was about to say something, a Committee woman, dressed all in black, came rushing up to them and called over two guards to take the slaves away.

‘Father Dekulos?’ she wheezed through dark fat lips. ‘What is this?’

‘Do not worry, Anjulie. We are just visiting. This is Father Nimite from the Evermarch Temple.’

Anjulie took them to a shaded area where tables and chairs were laid out for the Committee members.

She arranged her long black skirts around her legs, revealing gout-ridden toes in loose dusty sandals. She fanned herself with a piece of carboard torn from an orange box as they spoke.

After some small talk Nimite asked, ‘can I see where the slaves are kept?’ and rather reluctantly the Committee woman toured them around some of the barns where the women lived and slept. As they went between the buildings, he noticed something.

‘And what is that?’ he asked, pointing to an area of ground that was scorched black and littered with burnt wood.

‘That’s where we burn the witches, Father.’

He went over and kicked up some of the ash.

‘And how may have you burned here?’

‘I’d have to check the records Father, but at least thirty.’

Nimite looked up again and let his eyes rest on the horizon for a moment, a distant tree line of brown and green, sweltering under the rich blue sky. He could tell he was making Anjulie and Dekulos nervous, and he was leaning into his stern demeanour to make sure they stayed that way. Underneath he was overcome with emotion, and fearful of what they might do if they stopped fearing him. All this sort of thing was supposed to be done with. After the madness of the first year, there were laws in place to stop this sort of thing. Laws that were enforced by the church.

After a long silence he cleared his throat and said, ‘show me your records, Miss Anjulie. Specifically for the acquirement of slaves.’


***

Samuel had found his way to a shady spot by the main gate that overlooked some of the coffee fields, where he now sat, watching the workers come and go. He was a city boy and the farm looked almost idyllic to his untutored eyes. The women tended and harvested to some schedule that was utterly mysterious to him, but it seemed like good honest work, out in the fresh air. It was a shame that slavery had to come into it. While the clergy dealt with the muta woman, he drank a cup of iced sugarcane juice one of the kitchen women had bought him. He was tall and well dressed in his driver’s suit and he could see that he was drawing their eyes.

A large clansmen came across the yard and sat on the log beside him, then offered him a cigarette which Samuel declined. The tanned and muscular man wore a patch over his right eye.

‘You the Red Cross man?’ asked Samuel.

‘Aye,’ nodded the man, breathing smoke out of his nose.

The man introduced himself as Edward McQuade and went on to tell Samuel something of the farm. ‘Aye, my beat is this place, the men’s camp further in and two more farms on the other side of the river. This place is the worst, so I stay here most of the time. It would be a decent profitable farm if it wasn’t for that fucking Anjulie. She roasts about a woman a month at the moment.’

‘Can’t you do anything?’

‘Not much,’ admitted Ned with a shrug. ‘Last week I could at least make sure they got phone calls, but my troposcatter back to Evermarch is down, so I’m pretty redundant. I can mostly stop the burnings if I’m here, but my boss gets mad at me if I don’t visit the other camps.’

‘Troposcatter, what’s that?’ asked Samuel.

Ned nodded over to what looked like an army truck with a satellite dish on it.

‘Don’t let that dish fool you. It’s not satellites, it bounces microwaves on the troposphere layer of the atmosphere. Got a range of five hundred kilometres, but is doing bugger all at the moment. The fucking receiver must be down again.’

Samuel, intrigued, got up and walked towards the truck. An hour later this was where Father Nimite found him, sat in the back of the MAN truck as McQuade talked him through the intricacies of microwave communication.

‘Samuel!’ Father Nimite called up to him. ‘Are you in there?’

‘Yes, Father,’ replied Samuel as he hopped down from the back.

‘It’s worse than we could have though Samuel,’ said Nimite wiping sweat off his face with a handkerchief. ‘They have no law here. No church. The Committee are slaughtering dem up here. In this camp and de other places.’

Samuel nodded. He had been hearing all about it from the McQuade.

‘No phones here, so you’ll need to go back by yourself,’ went on Nimite.

‘What about you Father?’

‘I’m going to stay here and see what I can do,’ said Nimite. ‘Some of these women. Dey belong to the church. I see the paperwork. Get them out of here and give them a good wash and a feed. How dey end up here God only knows, but they are church property.’

Samuel seemed about to say something, but then appeared to think better of it. He looked over Nimite’s shoulder, scanning for Father Dekulos.

‘What is it, Sam?’

‘Well,’ hedged Samuel, trusting Nimite but knowing that telling on a priest had to be done carefully. He drew Nimite away from the vehicle and in a low voice said, ‘the Red Cross man, he be tellin me. Father Dekulos has been selling the church slaves to the farm. He allowed to do that?’

‘No,’ sighed Nimite. The priest then kissed his teeth. ‘If Father Dekulos has sold them to the Committee, then he would have needed to get a writ from a bishop. And where he get that out here?’

Nimite thought for a moment. Samuel looked up at the sky.

‘We take them anyway,’ he said. ‘Likely Dekulos sold them illegally. He never tink we come down this way again, I’m sure. You take them Sam, then we see what happens. I’ll write you a letter to take back to Bishop Thorman.’

‘What you think the bishop do?’ asked Samuel.

‘I don’t know,’ admitted the priest. ‘Shut it all down I hope.’



***

Three hours later, as the sun was beginning to head towards the horizon and Wormwood was rising in the south, Samuel set off with four women in his SUV. They all smelled of the fields, sweat and sunburnt skin. There was a clanswoman in the back along with a skinny backdam girl and a monstrously large woman that had to hunch over even to sit down on the back seat.

In the passenger seat was a middle-aged heretic woman in a tattered floral dress who prattled on about her missing husband until Samuel had to tell her to shut up.

After another twenty minutes of silence, the clanswoman leaned forward and spoke to him. ‘Tina needs to pee.’

‘She just have to hold it in,’ said Samuel without turning. ‘I’m not stopping until Goldengreens is far behind.’

‘This is a nice car,’ replied the clanswoman, apparently not scared of him at all. ‘Won’t you get into trouble if she pees in it?’

Samuel was about to tell her to shut up as well, but then he saw up ahead that one of the check points they had gone through in the dark on the way down was now manned. Four armed men, dressed in black, were waving at him to stop. Samuel hit the central locking button and opened the driver side window half-way.

As they slowed down, he told the women, ‘don’t speak and don’t get out of the car.’

The evident leader of the men leaned down to the window, his broad face dripping with sweat. He was very dark skinned with crooked yellow teeth. ‘Who are deez woman?’ he asked.

‘Slaves,’ replied Samuel. ‘Dey is church slaves. I’m on church business. This be a church car.’

The armed man stepped back then went round to the rear of the car to look at the license plate. When he returned he said, ‘show me your pay-pas.’

Besides his Evermarch ID, Samuel only had the letter from Father Nimite for the bishop and he had a feeling it would be fairly anti-Committee so showing it would do more harm than good.

‘I do not have any papers for you,’ he said eventually. ‘Just a letter for the bishop, but it is…’

Just then, the woman in the passenger seat started talking. ‘Brother!’ she cried, addressing the Committee soldier. ‘Brother! You must help me! I have been sold and gone from here to there and gone to everywhere! I am a God-fearing woman! My husband has been taken by bandits in the hills.’

Another of the guards taped on the window with the barrel of his gun, and she opened the door.

‘What is your story, Sista?’ asked the younger, taller Committee soldier. He was holding an AK-47 in both hands and stepped back as she got out of the car.

‘I do not want to go to Evermarch, Brother!’ she sobbed. ‘I need to go back to find my husband.’

‘Come with us, Sista,’ said the young soldier, motioning to the guard hut with his gun. ‘We can help you.’

The woman in the patterned dress took a few steps, but then turned back to the car, suddenly in doubt.

‘Heh,’ said the large-faced guard. ‘Heh, driver. We take all these women, eh? Maybe dey are all looking for dey husbands?’

Samuel looked over his shoulder. The two other guards were at the rear doors trying to get in. The three women in the back cowered, sheltering behind the big woman. He looked to his left again and saw the woman in the patterned dress being dragged off. When his eyes caught hers, she screamed, a feral cry of terror. Samuel put his foot down heavily on the accelerator and the wheels spun kicking up stones into the faces of the guards at the back. As the car sped off, the women in the back screamed, but no shots were fired.

As they disappeared into the jungle, the clanswoman said, ‘you can’t leave her there! You can’t just leave her! What do you think they are they going to do to her?’

Samuel had a fair idea what was going to happen to her but said nothing.

‘Do you hear me?’ she said, louder this time as she all but clambered into the front.

Samuel pushed her back. ‘What could I do woman?’ he demanded, almost yelling. ‘What could I do? In another second you would all be in the same pot, and I would be dead.’

The big woman silently pulled the clanswoman back.

‘I told you not to talk! I told you not to get out!’ continued Samuel, on the edge of hysteria. ‘Nothing like this ever happen to me. The muta in Evermarch, dey respect the church. Those were bandits, dey bad men. We respected in Evermarch…’

Samuel went on talking, but eventually he ran out of breath. After a few more minutes he had recomposed himself enough to ask, ‘did you know her?’

‘No,’ admitted the clanswoman. ‘We did not know her.’

Samuel glanced back at the small bule woman but said nothing. After another minute or so, she tapped him on the shoulder.

‘What?’ he asked.

‘Sorry driver,’ she replied quietly. ‘Tina peed herself.’

Silently he reached into the glove compartment and passed back a box of tissues.


Tuesday, 14 June 2022

Paradise - Chapter 3: Leviticus (4561) (DRAFT!!)

 


Chapter 3: Leviticus (4561)

 

Duckman, that’s what they called him. He didn’t know it, but that’s what they called him on his road. Duckman because he looked like a duck. Nobody bothered him, and he bothered nobody. He never left his house unless it was to go to the corner shop at the end of the road, or the library up the hill. He went from one to the other each day, with a plastic bag full of messages and a sketchpad under his arm, and the people would say, ‘oh look, there goes Duckman’.

Just another one of Evermarch’s oddities, not leaving his local area enough to be one of the weel kent folk, but well known on his road. He didn’t go to the pub, or take a paper, so when the tower blocks disappeared on the other side of the river, he assumed that they had been knocked down and he had not noticed.

When the corner shop disappeared where he used to buy his morning rolls and was replaced by a warung he assumed that it was just another change that he had to get used to. Afterall, ten years ago, the hairdresser he went to had changed into a financial advisor’s office and that had been even more baffling. Now he got his rolls from the minimarket by the library and his soto ayam from the warung.

He had no idea that God was back. (And bigger than ever before, baby!) He did not read the newspapers or watch the news. He had no friends. For thirty years he had played no part in society and expected nothing from it. He lived off a small inheritance, a meagre pension and whatever form of social security entitlement happened to be in vogue in any given decade.

His best friend was a garden gnome that stood in an overgrown garden at the other end of his road. When a young man had moved in there, he had put the gnome in the front garden ironically, underneath a wild fern. Rain or shine the gnome stood there, under the fronds, a happy smile on his face and his hand raised in a friendly wave. Duckman began waving to the gnome as he went past. This went on for years.

The young man that lived at the house got married and Duckman would see his wife tending to the garden, tidying it up a bit and planting bulbs. She did not disturb the gnome, which made Duckman happy. One day he did a little drawing of the gnome at the library with the words ‘Gnome, sweet gnome’ on it and left it on their doorstep.

Round about the time the tower blocks disappeared, the couple had a baby, which was why, he assumed, the garden went back to being overgrown again. Around that time too, people started wearing masks, at the shop and at the library, so he did too. They gave them away free at the library and since it seemed to be required, he always wore one when out of the house, even though he found them rather uncomfortable. Still, he liked to do his sketches each day, from the library books, of animals and far off places, so it was a discomfort worth enduring.

He had no idea that some of his neighbours used to watch him amble up and down their road, with amusement and speculation on his life. Little did they know that what they saw was all there was.

One day he was dismayed to see that part of the gnome’s hat had been chipped off, he didn’t know how it had happened, hit by a falling stick from one of the trees in the garden perhaps. The gnome still smiled, but he did not look quite so jolly with half of his little blue hat missing.

Duckman went so far as stepping into the garden to look at the damage.

The man’s wife came to the door. She startled him by saying, ‘you know, you need to put tassels on your coat now, hun. You don’t want the muta to get you!’

He was too shocked to reply and ran back to his house. The woman’s comments made him remember a letter, addressed to the ‘homeowner’, that had arrived a couple of months ago. He’d disregarded it, as he did all his mail, but now he re-read it, paying attention this time.

That night he cut the tassels off the bottom of the sofa and sewed them onto his donkey jacket. It looked ridiculous, but along with the mask and keeping a beard, that was what you had to do these days to be considered fit for society.

A week or so later there were people dressed in black in the street. They set up a check point and were talking to people as they went about. One day, when he was going to the library, some of the people dressed in black dragged the man and his wife from their house. The man was silent, but the woman was screaming. They were taken to a van and driven away. Another of the black clad people went back into the house and came out holding a baby. The black-masked man, still holding the baby glanced down at the gnome as he passed. He then stopped to give it a kick, smashing it to pieces.

Duckman, who had been standing right there, ran home as fast as he could, locked the door and didn’t come out again until his food ran out and it was either leave the house or starve to death.

When he went back out, months later, things had changed. There were no more roadblocks or black clad people, but the street was covered in rubbish and two of the houses had been burnt down.

The house where the couple had lived was now occupied by a single man, who liked to sit at the front door on a wooden bench, watching the world go by. He was middle-aged, but his beard was long and white. He wore a blue woollen cap and looked so much like Duckman’s friend the gnome that for a moment he was confused.

‘You’re back!’ gasped Duckman.

The man in the blue cap turned to face him. ‘Eh?’

When Duckman fled, the man did not rise from the bench. He had a lot on his mind. His name was Ray Lorric, and he had just learned that his ex-wife had sold herself into slavery.

 

***

The letter read:

‘Dear Ray,

I got your address through the Red Cross. I’m here in Evermarch! When the world got all jumbled up, our bit of Perth ended up not so very far away. Near Norway I’m told. It was hell there and we had to get away, there was constant trouble, bodies in the street, you wouldn’t believe it. We paid people-smugglers to take us to Strake, but they took everything. Then when we were trying to get across the border they wanted more. So twat-face Gary sold me to the church! He promised to get a job, earn money and buy me back, but God knows what’s happened to him. Now the church has sold me to a farm in a place called Goldengreens. The Red Cross lady told me they are still ways to free slaves in Evermarch. Ray, you’ve got to help me. Last night one of the other slaves was shanked in their sleep. I can’t survive this. They told me you work for the church? Or something? Remember me and help me,

Helen’

Lorric folded the letter and went indoors. What did all this mean? The last he’d heard she’d ended up north of the Artic Circle, he remembered from the news at the time, back when people were trying to figure out what had happened and work out the new geography that that was where a lot of Australia had ended up. The thought of her and Gary freezing their arses off had given him pleasure, until he had found out that the climate followed along with the land, you just had to drive down to the Delta to realise that. Lorric put the letter down on the piano in the living room. He never played it, it had been here when he moved in, he used it as a narrow desk and dumping ground for mail.

He wasn’t working today, so spent half an hour choosing a VHS tape to watch. There was never anything on the TV and video recorder would be confiscated by the muta if they found it, but as long as he was kept the TV turned away from the window and the sound low, he was fine. He put Die Hard on, but after ten minutes he realised his eyes were resting on the letter.

‘Stuff her,’ he muttered. ‘Stuff her and that fud, Gary. Stuff the pair of them. God’s sake.’

Lorric didn’t work for the church, she’d got that wrong. Admittedly he was on good terms with them though, through his job with the call centre. Having a direct line to God did have its advantages.

For the rest of the day, he rattled about, trying to ignore the letter, but the next morning, when he was working, he had a call to make to Merric College anyway, so he decided to have a word with the bishop. After all, what was a phone call? It was no big deal.

 

‘Is that Bishop Thorman?’

‘Yes, it is, how can I help you?’ came the emotionless reply.

‘Aye, it’s Raymond here from the call centre. I was just wondering if you had a moment.’

The bishop cleared his throat. ‘Go on.’

Lorric briefly explained the letter he had received from his ex-wife and the bishop listened patiently, checking his computer as he did so, but when Lorric had finished, he said, ‘there is nothing you can do Mr Lorric. She did it herself, handing herself over to the church. We then sold her. There is a note here in her file, that it was either that or be burned as a witch.’

‘You’re kidding me!’  exclaimed Lorric. She hadn’t mentioned that in her letter. She was always a liar.

‘They are a bit keener on that sort of thing in Goldengreens I’m afraid. Still, I could arrange a meeting for you. Goldengreens is part of our diocese, on paper at least.’

‘Oof, you mean go all the way into the jungle?’

There was a pause.

‘Ah yes I see,’ said Thorman. ‘Your ex-wife isn’t it? I could arrange a call then?’

‘Thank you, Your Grace.’

***

It was probably nothing. After all, Bishop Thorman didn’t care overly much about one daft witch who was a step away from the faggots. It was Lorric though, who was one of the good ones, as the bishop saw it, and this was far from the first sinister thing he’d heard about Goldengreens. It was eighty miles deep into the jungle though, and not many people went there these days. Stories came out, none of them pleasant, but there were so many stories these days it was impossible to know what was real and what wasn’t. Things were bad enough in Evermarch, Thorman didn’t need to go eighty miles into the interior looking for trouble when he had trouble enough. And yet… It wouldn’t do any harm to scratch the itch. There had been no reliable reports from Goldengreens in months, perhaps he should send someone down there? 

Towards that end Thorman arranged a meeting with Father Nimite. The Father was an ebony-skinned priest from the Delta, a priest from Georgetown before the reditus and rendered parish -less, just as Thorman had, by the Splintering. As a result, they had both started at the temple at the same time, and while they were hardly friends, Thorman secretly found that he liked the younger man.

‘Oh, it’s a bad down there, from what I hear,’ said Father Nimate, when they stood together in Grayfriars Church tower, watching the foot-traffic of the people below as they entered and exited the Temple. It was early evening and getting dark. The streetlights had flickered on, and people were starting to hasten their steps, trying to get home as quickly as possible. There was no curfew, but the muta were a law to themselves once the sun was down and it was better to be indoors.

 ‘Hundred women dey got down theh. Some Committee ting. They let in the Red Cross, but not the church. Dey burning them. That’s what dey say down in the Delta.’

‘That doesn’t sound good at all. Would you like to go down there?’ asked Thorman. ‘You can take one of the pool cars and a driver. I just want to know exactly what’s going on, not just rumours on the Delta.’

‘Oh sure, I know the parish priest, Father Dekulos.’

‘I remember him, yes,’ admitted the bishop. ‘See how hard he’s been trying to get access. If not him, then try the Red Cross.’

‘Yes, Your Grace.’

‘Well, that’s good then… there is something else?’

Nimite was in the process of taking a folded-up bit of paper from his pocket. Once he had it in hand, he waved it at the bishop.

‘You seen this?’

‘What is it?’ asked the bishop.

‘Another letter from the Committee,’ cried Nimite. ‘Dey send it to me house! To me own address. And me a priest at the Evermarch Temple!’

Thorman took the offered paper, unfolded it, and gave it a cursory glance although he had already guessed what it was.

‘Just ignore it, William.’

‘Easy ting for you to say,’ said Father Nimite, then remembering himself he added, ‘Your Grace.’

‘It’s because the pickup for circumcision has been so poor in the Delta. They are sending them to everyone.’

‘What do they expect?’ whined Nimite. ‘The Delta, they just go hide in the jungle. In the hills. Even before, they did that. The clansmen be at me door next, just like last time. I’ve got better things to do with me time, I’m telling you… Your Grace.’

‘I don’t know, William,’ sighed Thorman. ‘Why does the Committee do anything? They’ve got it worse in Estola and Feuro, or so I hear.’

Nimite was tugging at Thorman’s sleave now, smiling and laughing, what would have been a most inappropriate display from a priest back before the reditus, but which was very much standard behaviour for Father Nimite.

‘We lucky we splinter with you clansmen, eh?’ asked Nimite conspiratorially. ‘And not the hablas or the spaghettis, eh?’

‘Behold, the Lord maketh the earth empty, and maketh it waste, and turneth it upside down, and scattereth abroad the inhabitants thereof,’ quoth Thorman.

‘When you put it like that, we got lucky, like you say,’ said Nimite, although it had been he himself who had voiced the sentiment.

‘I’ll talk to them William. You can leave this letter with me.’

‘Of course, Your Grace,’ replied Nimite with a bow. ‘Me naw care anyway. They can stick it where Polly put the nuts for all me care.’

 

***

A couple of days went by and Lorric had nearly forgotten about his ex-wife and the phone call to Bishop Thorman. Lorric worked as the manager of a call centre, a job that he did at home and usually he only kept the call centre workers in line, but occasionally, if they were short staffed or whatever he would take a call. Today was one of those days, and he was logged into the system, dealing with a recent backlog.

‘Mrs Jarvis?’

‘Aye love, who’s that?’

‘Hello Mrs Jarvis, my name is Raymond. I am calling on behalf of the Evermarch Temple. I am a layman, which means I am a non-ordained member of the Church. I am in no way affiliated with The Committee for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice. I am calling to ask you a few questions about God if you don’t mind and have a moment. If now it not a good time, we can arrange a later date.’

‘Och well, I’d better get it over and done with.’

Mrs Jarvis knew the score, reflected Lorric. If you put off these tracer calls, you’d eventually end up with a uniformed church policeman at the door, or worse, a Committee representative. Usually even just mentioning the muta was enough to keep people on the line.

‘Thank you,’ continued Lorric. ‘I’ll just crack on with the questions. Firstly, what is your Splinter status?’

‘Glasgow, post. Evergreen,’ she replied as she had many times before to similar questions since the reditus.

‘Any Splinter viruses?’

‘Just the blue tongue, back in April last year.’

‘Good, good,’ said Lorric, getting into it. ‘And during the reditus, did God speak to you?’

‘Well aye,’ she wheezed, evidently lighting a cigarette as she spoke. ‘He did aye. He told me - Thou shalt not curse the deaf, nor put a stumbling block before the blind, but shalt fear thy God : I am the Lord. – seemed a bit random to me.’

‘It’s Leviticus, Mrs Jarvis.’

‘Aye well, I know that now. I think about it a lot, ken? Seems odd to me. What a bunch of jokers those Hebrews must have been, eh? Always tripping up the blind, doing it so much in fact that God had to tell them not to.’

‘Not for me to say, Mrs Jarvis.’

‘Did he speak to you, love?’

‘He did not,’ admitted Lorric. ‘He spoke to only one in ten people, and most of it was Bible verses. Some of it was more interesting though.’

‘So I’ve heard.’

‘But you speak to him now, aye? That’s where all this goes, right?’

‘Not exactly, Mrs Jarvis. It’s true that tracers do make calls directly to God from time to time, but that’s not where these reports go. We transcribe them and send them to Merric College.’

‘Then what?’

‘As you have indicated that God spoke to you, you can expect a follow up call in the next six to eight weeks.’

‘Or, right. I dinnae get off that lightly then?’ she joked.

And so it went on, Lorric took down her details and as he had told her, the information was all entered into a computer system on the Temple network. Lorric had no great interest in what happened after that. His job was just to make sure the fifty or so tracers that worked under him kept on making their allotted amount of calls each day.

 

After a few more calls he went and put his feet up for a bit. A few minutes later the phone rang, and he assumed it was work, so he was surprised to hear the voice of his ex-wife at the other end of the line.

‘Hi, Ray?’

‘Jesus!’ he exclaimed. ‘I mean, it’s you. How are you?’

‘You talked to the Temple?’ she countered.

‘I did yes,’ evaded Lorric.

‘Well, what did they say?’

‘They said they’d look into it,’ which was hardly the truth and Lorric knew it.

There was a pause while (what it sounded like to Lorric anyway) Helen spat out the nail she had just chewed off.

‘What’s it going to take Ray? You want me to beg? I’m dead if I stay here. You want that on your conscious?’

‘Why don’t you try and find Gary instead of pestering me?’ snapped Lorric, startling even himself with his lack of patience.

‘The muta must have got him. I don’t know. He could be anywhere. Every night three men sit on me and speak in tongues for an hour. How can I go on like this?’

‘Why?’

‘They are trying to get the demons out of me.’

Good luck with that, thought Lorric.

‘Ray,’ she went on. ‘I’m dead if I stay here. I don’t care if…’

She was suddenly sobbing. Lorric began to soften.

‘Hey,’ he soothed. ‘I’ll figure something out.’

‘They burn people here,’ she hissed. ‘I’ve seen it! They do it here. It’s not like in the films, where they burn Joan of Arc or something, and it’s all kind of majestic and noble. It’s not. They scream and scream, then choke to death on their own smoke. And the smell!’

‘Right, I…’

‘I’ve got to go. The Red Cross just give us a few minutes. Help me please, for God’s sake!’

And with that she was cut off.

 

It took a while for Lorric’s nerves to settle after that and he poured himself several whiskies in the kitchen, something that he rarely did. He hated Helen for everything she had done to him, but it was a long time ago now. The truth was, there wasn’t much he could do. He could call the bishop again he supposed. Thorman seemed like a decent enough sort, but not very effective, a typical old school clergyman. Lorric did have a direct line to God, but it was such a codified and arcane process he’d probably have more luck with a message in a bottle. After his third drink he decided to wait before doing anything else, after all, she had always exaggerated or down-right lied. Perhaps if he just left it, the situation would sort itself out, one way or the other.

***

‘It’s only going to get colder,’ said Avon, pulling the ratty old dressing-gown around him that he had taken to wearing. He scratched himself, he was sure he had fleas.

‘We can ask for more blankets,’ said Yates, his fellow occupant of the cold attic room they had been inhabiting for the last six months.

‘Bah,’ muttered Avon, as he silently padded over to the room’s only chair, always stepping on the beams, and sat down on its sagging cushion. ‘I’d rather they bought us a mobile phone.’

‘They don’t work anymore,’ said Yates, from where he sat, propped up on the bed, reading last week’s newspaper.

‘You always say that. You’re utterly hopeless. It’s what, November now? I’ve not spoken to any of my family since then. We can’t go on like this. It’s intolerable.’

‘I know darling, I know.’

Avon rolled his eyes. ‘Don’t darling me. We could still be in England you know. We could still have been at home if it hadn’t been for you.’

Yates sighed. This was a familiar reframe, old ground that had been trodden and re-trodden many times since they had been confined in the attic. The same old recriminations, the same old arguments, the same old tears.

‘There is no England anymore,’ he said patiently. ‘They don’t even know where half of it is.’

‘Our part of it is still there,’ growled Avon. ‘We could try to get there. We could at least try.’

Yates put down the paper and took off his glasses.

‘We are here because of you,’ he stated. ‘This was your idea!’

‘I know, I know,’ muttered Avon. ‘But let’s see Scotland you said. We’ve never been north of Manchester you said, we’d…’

‘And you loved it!’ interrupted Yates. ‘It’s not my fault the whole bloody… thing happened.’

Avon stood up, tip-toed over the beams again and lay down beside Yates.

‘It’s so cold.’

‘In the summer you did nothing but complain about the heat,’ Yates scolded mildly.

‘She used to bring us ice cream then at least, now I think she’s doesn’t care about us.’

Yates put his arm around Avon’s shoulder. ‘Nonsense.’

‘Don’t touch me, I stink,’ said Avon. ‘I can’t stand it when we both smell so bad.’

‘We could ask for more wet wipes.’

‘I’d rather they brought us a mobile phone.’

Yates pushed Avon on the shoulder. ‘You’re impossible!’

‘Just a couple of old impossible poofs,’ sighed Avon. ‘Just a couple of smelly old impossible poofs, hiding from the muta in a friend’s attic.’

‘We could just leave,’ said Yates, pointing at the newspaper. ‘Things are a lot calmer since last year.’

‘Shush!’ replied Avon, pressing his face into the pillows. ‘Don’t remind me. All that…’

‘I know, I know.’

Avon looked up. ‘Where did they all go? Agatha, where did she go? All the boys from Barkley’s? In the back of the black vans. And the night they came for us, I’ll never forget it. The car with its engine running, you shouting at me to get a move on. Then the Committee at the door and us just fleeing, fleeing for our lives! How can I go back out there? You might be able to blend in, but me? I’d stick out like a sore thumb. Even your father said, before we were married - “that Phillip Avon is more bent than a nine-pound note”. I’d be picked up in minutes.’

‘Just put on a hoodie and keep your head down, you’d be fine,’ but Yates laughed as he spoke. At the absurdity of it, of Avon who has once been so finely dressed and dashing, dressed like a chav or whatever they called them these days.

‘Look at me!’ demanded Avon. ‘Look at me! What do you see? I’ll tell you. I’m old, Ben. I’m starting to look like a withered old woman. I’ve got dishpan hands and swollen ankles. I’m a complete and utter state.’

‘Oh, shut up.’

‘It wouldn’t kill her to bring up some moisturiser, or some hand cream. I’m wasting away, I can’t eat. Look at the size of you, you eat all the food you monster. I eat morsels. I’m malnourished. I’ve not seen daylight in six months. We can’t go on like this.’

‘Keep your voice down, will you?’ said Yates, finding his near-infinite patience was beginning to wear thin. ‘The Hartley’s will be home soon, then you’d better put a sock in it. For God’s sake, we can leave, or we can stay and wait it out. Either way, we are safe for now at least; it could be worse. Maggie is helping us, we are safe, we are loved.’

‘Don’t say “for God’s sake”, darling,’ murmured Avon. ‘Never say that.’

Yates made a harrumphing sound and picked up the newspaper again. ‘Let that be an end of it then.’

‘I love it when your strict with me,’ said Avon demurely. ‘When Maggie comes up then, we’ll ask for more blankets, and wet wipes, and hand cream.’

‘Sure.’

Avon slowly rose and picked up a glass from the floor and walked over to the far wall. He then pressed the glass to the wall and then his ear to the glass. This was his entertainment, his soap opera. The Hartley’s were a young noisy family, the wife was loud, and the husband was a drunk. Some nights the fights were so loud Avon didn’t need the glass and even Yates could hear every word from over on the bed where he rustled his newspaper and tutted.

‘She’s back first,’ muttered Avon.

‘I don’t care,’ mouthed Yates in replay.

Avon listened for a few more minutes. ‘She’s calling one of his friends, trying to find out where he is. She’ll be angry the children were left alone…’

Then after a long pause he went on, ‘she’s getting cross. She’s in the bedroom yelling at one of the kids. The eldest daughter, I think… The little one was never fed…’

Yates could hear the voices next door getting louder. With a sigh he picked up and old pair of headphones and put them on. He then turned on the aging mp3 player they were attached to.

Avon gave him a dismissive wave and turned back to the wall. He’d get a good few hours of entertainment tonight, with a fairly explosive grand finale when the drunken bastard of a husband finally made it home, or so he hoped. He dragged over a cushion and sat down on the floor, getting comfortable for the evenings show.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

Wednesday, 25 May 2022

Saturday, 14 May 2022

(G486 07/05/2022 via Roll20 - AP, JF(GM), KT, AD) HOM10

 
(G486 07/05/2022 via Roll20 - AP, JF(GM), KT, AD) HOM10

[The adventurers Griffolk Ethyn the Dragon-Shaman, Sparkledingle the Gnome Wizard and Fangorino the Barbarian are on a mission to follow Baroness Partick and have been onboard the galleon known as the Dementor for several weeks now.
Recently the First mate, Mull-Master had gone crazy and killed one of the crew. The adventurers managed to subdue him and stashed him in the infirmary. Now read on...]

DAY 23 (12) cont ...

An hour later, Griffolk, Sparkledingle and Fangorino huddled together in one of their cabins and discussed their options.

The first idea mooted was to sink the ship. There were two boats up on the deck, the jolly boat and the captain's pinnace. All the crew and passengers would struggle to fit in them though.

So rather than that they decided to go and talk to Captain Pickles. Pickles was a half-halfling, just about five feet tall, so his cabin was built with his size in mind. He was jolly, almost manically so, and poured them all drinks and offered them food when they came to visit him.

They laid out all their worries, but each of them he poo-poo'd, saying:
'I know the sea can be a scary place if you've not sailed on it before! But don't worry, we are not cursed! The death of Surgeon Minty was a tragic accident, nothing more, and Mull-Master - well you know half-orcs! Strong fellows, but sometimes they can go a bit doo-lally! Everything else we can put down to bumps in the night and over-active imaginations! Hahahahaha!'
He laughed loudly and poured them all more drinks.

Every other attempt to get through to him failed. Fangorino even tried to scare some sense into the fellow by slamming his axe down on the table.
Pickles was not phased though and said, 'Don't be silly old chap. Now try some of this Waterdavian Whiskey, its sixteen years old!'

Pickles more or less successfully diverted any other attention by getting the men drunk on fine wines and spirits. Sparkledingle did not drink, but he was fighting a loosing battle.

He noticed, among the various curios in the cabin, a withered hand in a display case. 'Gulp! What's that captain?' he enquired.

Pickles muttered the start of a story, but lost his thread, hiccupped and poured them all another drink. Sparkledingle tried a ruse of going out, casting Detect
Thoughts, and coming back in again. He tried it twice, but both times he failed to get anything out of the Captain's mind.

Once they were indecently drunk the young men went to the galley and demanded of Cookie Cook, 'Chips and cheese please Cookie! And a kebab!'


DAY 24 (13)

The Dementor made good progress today. Murky misty weather. No sinister events happened today.


DAY 25 (14)

After lunch Griffolk decided to unfold a deck chair and sit on the main deck reading his 'Monster Manual' recently bought in Candlekeep.
Every time someone passed him he drew their attention to the chapter on vampires.

This caused a bit of a problem for him when, later in the afternoon, the body of one of the stewards was found, drained of blood, in Griffolk's cabin.

Gingols the Sane was the first on the scene and he raised a hue and cry. He was certain that Griffolk was to blame, but everyone else were not convinced, even though he had been reading about vampires all morning!

Griffolk gathered everyone together in the dining room and they all carried out some 'garlic tests'. No one, not even Baroness Partick reacted how they thought a vampire might.

They then tried mirrors, but with the same negative results. Even so, some of the passengers where getting very uneasy. Jilly Hidescore was starting to put it all together.
'I agree,' she said. 'Something awful is going on and we need to find out what it is.'

At this point Baroness Partick nodded silently at the captain who then interrupted. 'Well, that's enough for now I think! Please, Mr Ethyn, if you could retire to your cabin for now, while I carry out further investigations.'

Everyone went back to their business. At this point, for some reason Fangorino attempted to intimidated Sparkledingle. It didn't work. Sparkledingle tried to Charm Person Fangorino. That didn't work either. After that they both gave up on trying to annoy each other and went to see Griffolk in his cabin.

There was a guard at the door, a sailor by the name of Bobby Shafto. He seemed a bright young man.

They did little else tonight other than come up with one bad idea after another only to dismiss them on consideration.
Plans included drilling a hole in the ship (but they lacked a drill) and using mirrors to channel light into the hold. They did have plenty of them, but they were all small, hand mirrors for ladies.

They ship's carpenter did sell them 20 stakes of ash and oak, although he refused to give them a drill under any circumstances.
'But, ahhh..' tried Sparkledingle. 'My friend has a wooden leg you see...'
'Stow your nonsense!' snapped the carpenter.


DAY 26 (15)

Captain Pickles called a meeting of crew and passengers and gave them an obviously made-up story about how Mull-Master had escaped the infirmary, killed the steward and then returned to his room.
'We've doubled the guard!' he declared. 'And that's the end of the matter.'

This was good news for Griffolk, but suspicious eyes still followed him at breakfast and lunch. Gingols seemed sure that Griffolk was to blame somehow.

Matters did not improve when there was a lot of banging and shouting when Mr Baleworth could no longer locate his wife. Mr B then spent the rest of the evening kicking up a fuss, demanding answers from everyone. He then accused Griffolk;
'That body in your room! You are always in the thick of it! Where's my wife, you cad!?'

Truthfully Griffolk did not know, and his genuine confusion seemed to convince Baleworth.
'Well then, what do we do, blast it man?' bellowed the aristocrat. 'I'm going to demand the captain turns us back to Candlekeep!'

Baleworth went to the captain's cabin, where it can be assumed that Pickles used his usual trick of appeasement with food, wine and strong spirits.

 
DAY 27 (16)

Mr Baleworth searched high and low once more for his wife on the Dementor. It was a big ship, but it was not too long before he found himself at the locked door where the evils lurked.
Soon he was back at Griffolk's door.
'You've been banging on about vampires in the hold. Well, let's go. Let's open it up!'

Griffolk wasn't so sure though. He remembered his instructions to make sure they arrived at Yacg'harr Island and realised that opening the hold would probably put an end to all of that.

'Bah, cowards!' he yelled and grabbed on of the stakes that was on the cabin dresser. He then went down to the hold.

Griffolk and Fangorino just shrugged and paid no more attention to what happened next. Only Sparkledingle was curious enough to follow him, and he did so while invisible.

'Open that bloody door!' he demanded of the sailor that was guarding the outer hold.
The sailor did so, but would go no further.
Baleworth entered the hold area and approached the door at the back where the evil lurked. The sailor, and Sparkledingle, watched from the far door.

'Petunia? Petunia?' called Baleworth bravely. 'Are you in there?'
He then pressed his ear to the door, listening.
Sparkledingle could hear something whispering, but could not make out the words.
'Is that you Petunia? Are you ok?' he whispered back.

There was a click, and the door slowly opened. Baleworth cautiously leaned forward to look into the darkness of the hold. Suddenly a pale skinned hand reached out and grabbed him by the next. Baleworth was yanked into the room and the door slammed shut. The sailor screamed and shut the outer door, nearly crushing Sparkledingle as he leapt out of the way.

I should hope they all felt bad about standing by and letting all that happen. When Sparkledingle reported it all back to the others, Griffolk decided to go around and talk to everyone else on the ship and dish out some cloves from his sack of garlic.

Sparkledingle talked to Cookie, but she had 20 bulbs of garlic of her own and did not need any more.

They talked to the sailor Bobby Shafto, but he did not need any convincing about there being vampires in the hold. When asked what he thought they should do, he replied;
'Begging your pardon, good sirs, but should it not be me asking your advice? You are a wizard, a dragon-um-person, and a barbarian. I am just a sailor.'
'Fair point,' agreed Griffolk who then gave the lad some garlic and a mirror.

They did the same for the sailor that had witnessed the end of Mr Baleworth.

Griffolk and Sparkledingle then canvassed the rest of the ship, looking for others that could be trusted and relied on if things all went pear-shaped;

- Gingols was in his room and was talking to no-one.
- Jilly Hidescore was very nervous and not at all talkative.
- First mate Mull-Master was still a raving madman
- Midshipman Krondor was talkative, but seemed oblivious to everything that was going on. She told them that she didn't believe that vampires existed and it was all a fuss about nothing
- Cook Cookie seemed like a dark horse, but when asked about her background she only said "wouldn't you like to know"

Finally though Sparkledingle stuck gold. He went to talk to the new Bosun, a middle-aged fellow called Redthorn.
'Keep it to yourself, little one, but I'm a Harper Agent. We got word of this ship and its evil cargo and since I happened to be in Candlekeep when you arrived it was decided I should
come on board and take a look. Seems like our suspicions were correct.'
'Oh praise Mistra, we're saved!' declared the gnome, who had heard of "Those Who Harp" and held them in high regard.
'I wouldn't go that far,' said Redthorn. 'Here, you three didn't arrive on board by accident either did you? Who do you work for?'
Sparkledingle was never very good at holding on to secrets so when he mentioned the name 'Cavu' his backers were revealed.
'Oh aye,' muttered the Bosun. 'Makes sense. Cavu always likes to hire the odd ones. Word of  warning to you though. He works for a powerful oracle called Gertrude the White. They won't care much if you live or die. They were all mixed up with the yuan-ti back in Waterdeep, that's what I heard. When we offered to help, they refused.'
Sparkledingle didn't know what to say to any of that, he was just happy that he'd finally met someone that appeared to be at least half-way competent!